February 20, 2002 (Wednesday)
Today a meeting of my support group's secretariat will be held at Nikko coffee shop. Maria cannot attend because our grandson is having an event, but I really appreciate those who will participate. I pray that the meeting will be constructive and fruitful. I will work hard drafting documents such as a written statement and a written opinion to be submitted to the court [see note]. It seems that I may be able to finish them earlier than expected. They will be written by hand, and not by word processor. I don't want to put an additional burden on Sister R, who has been helping me by typing up documents on a word processor.

Note. To the 7th criminal affairs section of the Osaka District Court, to which Mr. Yamano submitted a request for a new trial in October 2001.

February 21, 2002 (Thursday)
Some people think that, "since a person who has committed an act of killing must atone the sin with his or her own life, capital punishment must continue." However, of all those who have killed (meaning only those arrested, and not including unsolved cases), only one percent or so are executed. The other 99% have the possibility of resuming their place in society. This seems to imply that from the point of view of victims, 99% of cases end unsatisfactorily. Then, can be victims be satiated by the fact that 1% of the assailants are murdered using the death penalty? We need to discuss the following question: what kind of consciousness is it that keeps the death penalty alive? Is capital punishment the threat that, "state authorities have the power to give and take the lives of the people?" It seems like a uniquely bureaucratic idea that the death penalty cannot be stopped as long as the law exists. There do not seem to be any clear distinctions between people who have been handed down the death penalty and others who have received either life sentences or lesser prison terms. There are in fact among death row inmates very few people who shook society by taking many lives. Even if capital punishment is accepted as a form of revenge, only 1% of killers are subjected to retribution, and the other 99% are not. This is strange. And it's not appropriate.

February 25, 2002 (Monday)
Maria brought me 73 photos from when the second child of my second son, who lives in Yokohama, was brought to the shrine on February 18 [see note]. Maria went to the ceremony from Osaka along with my daughter and my first son's wife and two grandchildren. All my four grandchildren got together, and it must have been quite cheerful. The three older grandchildren have grown bigger since last year. I wish my grandchildren good luck!

Note. In Japan there is a tradition of bringing babies to a shrine soon after they are born.

March 3, 2002 (Sunday)
My incident took place in the midst of a situation where my company had fallen into crisis because a partner failed to fulfill a contract. I was in physical danger due to the violence of this man, he died as I was counterattacking to protect myself. I became an assailant due to the death of a man whom I was defending myself against. I cannot say that I was blameless for his death, because I was trying to defend myself. On that point I bear responsibility, and must atone for my sin. Apology is also needed. I have maintained this position ever since the first session of my first trial. If some people say, "he is only appealing his position, and showing no remorse," then they do not understand the complexity of the incident. What I can say for certain is, "I did not commit a crime that deserves the death penalty." I absolutely reject capital punishment. I have apologized to the victims for the points on which I bear responsibility. I have already been imprisoned for a long period of 20 years. I believe that I have paid for what I did with my body. What I am agonizing and thinking about today is, "What should do as a follower of Christ?" Every night I pray to the Lord, to the Holy Mother, to Saint Joseph, and to Saint Kolbe, and yet I do not yet have a clear answer. I would be happy if somebody could give me an answer.

March 4, 2002 (Monday)
Maria gave me a booklet called "Learning from Cries." It included a campaign/questionnaire for Lent. I wrote an appeal against capital punishment, and sent it today through Maria to the organizers, Caritas Japan [see note]. In the central courtyard below my window, I could see the peaches blooming here and there. I wonder if the cherry trees will bloom early this year.

Note. Caritas Japan is a social and welfare committee under the Catholic Bishops' Conference of Japan.